Sleep...again

Well, I know I keep writing about sleep. It's seems the only important thing when you aren't getting as much as you need. Last night was good. I didn't try to get in that last feed, I let them sleep until 9pm, and then fed them. Kade woke at 0430 and Elizabeth at 0530. I actually got 8 hours of sleep last night with only one interruption. We didn't get up until 0730, I had to wake them up. So now I must get in 6 more feedings before 10 pm. My whole day is wrapped around there feeding schedule. They are happy, content babies in the am. Kade is fussy in the evening and sometimes (like yesterday) is fussy from noon to night... I hope today is a more content day for him.

progress with sleep

Kade has been such a fussy baby. We started on Zantac a week and a half ago. He improved slightly, but not much. He was still fighting the bottle. I breast feed one feed and bottle the next, so each gets breast milk. (I just didn't have enough milk for 2). He might take 1-2 ounces with a bottle, while Elizabeth takes 3-4. He was either eating, sleeping, or crying. Rarely awake and content. We were using Emfamil gentlease for fussiness and gas. Yesterday evening we switched to Lactofree. He took the more than usual and faster (20 minutes instead of 40 and no fighting and crying). He even woke up enough at 10pm to take 1.5 ounces and then breastfeed for 10 minutes. Then ... he slept until 5am!!! and Elizabeth slept until 5:30am. I hope this will be the new pattern, but it's too early to tell. I feel so much better with 5 1/2 hours of straight sleep. (it should have been 6, but I woke up at 4:30 and couldn't believe both were still asleep, my breasts were too full, and I worried they weren't breathing, knowing they were fine, but still wondering, and talking myself out of going to check...I was relieved when Kade woke up... I know I'm crazy, but I have to adjust to them sleeping more too).

camping

We had a great time camping. The first hour was not so much fun!!! It had been 9 months since our last camping trip. I couldn't remember how to park the camper, where everything was kept, and only had one set of sheets. It's a good thing that the boys sleep in sleeping bags (and they where in the camper). I forgot to pack the twins new (and oh so adorable) swimsuits. Beau wouldn't let me take them to the "beach"/swim area, so I guess it didn't matter. But next time... we have another trip planned for father's day weekend. I slept just as well in the camper as at home. I usually have trouble getting comfortable, but I'm so sleep deprived that it was no problem. Kade and Elizabeth stayed on their schedule and only woke once at night to eat.

The day before we left we had Elizabeth's hair cut. I'm adding a picture of that as well. Now she no longer has a Mohawk. Now she looks much prettier!!! Stephanie German (A Cut in Time) cut her hair. She was great! It was the youngest (2 months) client she ever had.

lost brain cells

Someone asked me how things were going today and I said "good." When I had been home for about 5-10 minutes, Beau asked "where's Elizabeth"... I screamed "she's in the van, I forgot I took her with me". (she was fine, sound asleep). So maybe things aren't "good" I don't know if it's my age, breastfeeding, or lack of sleep; but my short term memory is failing.

We are going on our first camping trip with the twins. It may be our last and the camper may be for sale next week... I'll let you know.

Lack of sleep

Well, it was not a good night. We had been trying to get in 7 feedings between 6am and 10pm. It had been so difficult and seemingly useless when we tried to wake them up to eat at 10pm that I decided to try something a little different. I went back to feeding them every 3 hours (instead of 2.5). With there last feeding around 8:45pm. Kade started crying in his sleep at 1245pm. It was a fussy cry every few minutes, but enough to keep us awake. Finally at 0145, I got him up and fed him. Elizabeth woke up shortly after at 0215. Beau gave her a bottle. Kade woke up again at 5, so I broke all of the rules and nursed him in bed. Elizabeth woke up at 0520, and Beau got up and gave her a bottle. Now all of our times for today are messed up. I scheduled the ultrasound for Elizabeth at 1030, thinking that would be a good time between feeds. But now it isn't. With 2 it takes a while to feed them so they will either need to eat during the drive there, or when we get there. Woman's Hospital has a breastfeeding room, so I'll feed Kade there and give Elizabeth a bottle sometime... Today, I will go back to 7 feedings a day. One feeding at night is fine. 2 is so hard, especially on Beau who has to work.

I was so aggravated with Kade as I got out of bed last night. How silly is that, to be frustrated with a 9 week old, because he is hungry... However, as soon as I picked him up, I was overwhelmed with motherly love, snuggle time during breastfeeding is the best! Even at 2 am!

P.S. Elizabeths hips checked out just fine.

sleep

Kade slept from 1015pm until 3:45am. Progress!!! Elizbeth woke up at 2:20am, we hope for the day they both sleep 6 plus hours at the same time....

Everybody has an opinion

When you have your first child, you find out how many "experts" in child rearing there are...and its not just your friends and family, but total strangers will even give you there expert advice. Many people who know what you should do, don't even have children. Isn't it funny. It has been very interesting with the twins. What works well with one child will probably not work with 2. I've learned to smile, nod my head and ignore most of what other people say, suggest, or push on me. the only people I really pay attention to are those who have multiples, they have been where I am and I hope to learn from them, maybe avoid some mistakes.

I wish that I had researched how to raise twins while pregnant. I naively thought I knew what to do. I read the book "Baby Wise" when the twins were 6 weeks old. Many of the principles were in place, but some where not. Like keeping them awake after feeding them. That is still so hard! Some of my family think I'm crazy for bathing a sleeping baby. But this book says that over 90% of infants sleep through the night by 12 weeks of age if you follow there advice. I'm hanging on to this as I try any and everything to wake my sleeping baby during "wake time" and listening to my babies cry them selves to sleep during "sleep time". They are still not sleeping through night, but we're hoping. They'll be 9 weeks old tomorrow and I return to work in 4 weeks. Please Lord, let them sleep through the night by then, amen!

A friend suggested "Baby Whisperer" as a gentler approach that is similar to "Baby Wise". This book promises to help you learn your infants cry so you will know if they are hungry, lonely, bored, in pain, etc. We're thinking about ordering this book. The more info the better, right!??! Beau is just going with the flow and praying for sleep too.

The twins had they're first shots Friday, and we've had a weekend of fussiness, sleepiness, and fever. It's even harder to implement the Baby Wise principles when you know they don't feel well, and your family is here and hold the baby... Beau was at kids camp with the church, so avoided it all.

Elizabeth will have an ultrasound of her hip on Wednesday. We're checking for hip displasia, she has more creases on one thigh than the other. This apparently can indicate a problem. I'm not worried. I believe she is fine, and if there is a problem, it's no big deal. (I worried so much during the pregnancy, and know that this changes nothing, and wastes energy and is a poor witness for the hope I have in Christ) Yea, I'm making progress in my walk, thank you Jesus!

Thank God for Cole, all twins should come with 12 y/o. He is such a huge help!!! Even now as I write, he is holding Kade. I didn't even have to ask him to, he is singing and playing with him. What a blessing he is to me and the twins!!! He has even changed a few diapers, wonders never cease.

Walk on the wild side have twins.

the beginning

I wish that I had started the blog when I found out I was expecting twins. I will try to write now the short version. Overwhelmed with excitement, fear, but mostly disbelief. Beau and I even now, with Elizabeth and Kade 8 weeks old, will still look at each other and say "we have twins" or "there are two, did you notice we have 2 babies, not 1, but 2...". It is still hard to fathom. Beau was content with our 2 boys (Cole and Quinn). I always wanted a big family, at least 3, or maybe 5 children. But realized at the age of 38 that we should be done and I should find contentment with my two amazing, healthy, wonderful, and beautiful boys!!! I never would have prayed for twins, at least not since carrying and caring for 1 at a time.

The pregnancy was easy physically for the first 28 weeks. Mentally and spiritually the first few months were the most difficult. I came to believe that God gave this to me to get to spend more time with me. I have never prayed so much in my life. Terror reminded me of my dependence of God, and that I can't control anything. I learned to turn my fears over daily, and often minute by minute. My faith grew so much during this pregnancy. Not necessarily that the babies would be healthy and full term, but that no matter what, God would take care of me and mine. Such a peace would come over me and I would laugh at Satan, you didn't steal my joy today...It often was a daily battle that I faced each morning. some days it lasted only a few minutes and other a few hours. And after a few weeks the fear was only an occasional visitor, one who I would open the door to for just a few seconds and them slam it back with Psalm 34:4, I sought the Lord and He answered me, He delivered me from all my fears.
It became harder as time went on. I never dreamed it would be so difficult and uncomfortable. I will not go into details, in case any men read this. Suffice it to imagine 12 pounds of baby, 2 placentas, and 2 sacs of fluid...

The first 3 weeks at home and breastfeeding the twins was the most difficult....it was the hardest thing I've ever done. Harder physically and mentally than even when my mother was ill and dieing. I can't describe it, but I did get through it with help from my husband (Beau), my 12 y/o (Cole), and my hearts sister (Denise). Friends (Karen came from Seattle to help), family, and the church brought meals.

The twins are 8 weeks old now. We have a schedule that allows me enough time to care for my family and home. Well mostly my home, I'm learning a little dust and dirty dishes are not the most important thing (they will still be there when my babies are starting school) and that Quinn does a good enough job, and its OK if Beau does housework different than I do, or maybe not as well. I'm thankful that he helps!!!

I'm starting the blog to share the adventure. Twins are an adventure and a blessing. Sometime it's hard to remember that when you're breastfeeding one and holding another and one's diaper is leaking on you and the other just spit up down your shirt and no one is around to help...