Life with twins

3 year olds are Fun!

2010-10-11T16:12:00.000-07:00

I has been about a year since my last post. It has been a great and busy year! For those of you with young twins/children, i can finally report, it does get better! We are having so much fun with our twins! They are still busy, but manageable! I've even started working full time. My house is certainly not as tidy and clean as I would like it to be, but we are moving out of survival mode and slowly making our way to thriving.

I'm still on my antidepressant and my ambien. Don't know if I'll ever try to get off, I've become fond of sleep. Perhaps if Beau quits snoring, I won't need to ambien...lol

6 weeks later

2009-10-05T11:45:00.000-07:00

Thanks for all the comments on my last post. I'm feeling much better! I went back to the doctor last week. The people closest to me (kids, husband, cousin/sister) said I was much better...lol But the overwhelming fatigue/tiredness really had me down. I felt completely flat...no joy, on the other hand, I wasn't getting so angry, very little yelling/screaming (i was just too tired to get that upset over anything). After talking to my doctor, i decided to try taking the medicine in the morning instead of at night...it has made a world of difference!

I'm still a little tired, but I think that probably has to do with 4 kids, a husband, 3 dogs, 7 acres, part time nursing job, and running a home... Also, I've lost 5 pounds since being on the medicine and 10 pounds since July (i had gained 12 from March-July, when my diabetic medicines where switched up...switched back in July). It was not doing my self esteem any good, when my clothes weren't fitting... It is nice to have so many choices again in my closet! Still would like to lose another 30-40 and have a tummy tuck... well, that will have to wait until the twins are older ...lol I'll try for that goal when they are five!

Hopefully my posts will be informative and less venting! I'm glad to be finally finding my footing again. Feeling like a much better mother and wife!

Field trip with the twins tomorrow to a pumpkin patch. Will hopefully have some great pics to post!

1 week later...

2009-09-04T12:33:00.000-07:00

Well, I've been on the medicine for 1 week now. I can't really tell if it's working, but pms won't start for another 7-14 days... I am sleeping great! My biggest complaint is general fatigue!!! I don't think this is due to the ambien but the other med. I'm hoping that this side effect will go away with time.

Maybe it is working, I do seem to be screaming less, but this may just be due sleeping better and the overwhelming tiredness. Also, Quinn is being bullied at school and i have resisted the urge to go and hurt this boy, so it must be working...lol

PMDD

2009-08-27T15:31:00.000-07:00

For any of you who have read my posts this year, this will probably not come as a surprise, but I have been having "issues". I'm irritable and agitated most of the time, especially my pms time... Several friends have suggested I go see my doctor and get on some medicine or happy pills... I have resisted this prompting for over a year. I know so many people on "something" I had to wonder, is this all really necessary. Also, I all ready take several rx meds for my diabetes and hypothyroidism so I didn't really want to take more meds... I haven't had a good night sleep since the 3rd trimester of my twin pregnancy (I was on ambien). I do not have any of the fruits of the Holy Spirit, so sharing my faith would be a little, umm what shall I say, you want what I have... but who would want to have my anger, frustration, irritation, agitation, impatience...where is my peace, patience, gentleness, love... no one is attracted to my fruit.

Well after a complete meltdown last week (over not being able to find shoes for Kade...among other things) I decided to ask my husband if he thought I needed medicine...his answer was a very definitive, resounding...YES. When asked why he hadn't said something, he replied "I didn't want to make you angry" Well I went to the MD today. I started my new med today and he also gave me something to help me sleep. Praise God, I can't wait to go to be tonight! Beau will be glad to not be woken up to turn over (he snores loudly) or to rub my back (because I have been awake for 2 hours and can't sleep).

I just thought in all honesty and transparency that I should share that parenting a 14 y/o "man", and 10 y/o boy and 2 toddlers is exhausting, constant, demanding, and not usually very rewarding. I have not handled it well and finally realized that if something didn't change soon, I may permanently damage the spirits and emotions of my precious and much loved children.

I will keep my blog updated with my progress with my "psychotic behavior" as I call it and will hopefully begin to start producing the fruits that God wants to see in my life.

Invisible mom

2009-08-02T11:01:00.000-07:00

A friend emailed this to me. I've read it before, but I really needed to read it again! I know I'll need to remember that God sees it all. I decided to post it for any of you you might feel invisible and for myself!

The Invisible Mom
It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken to the store. Inside I'm thinking, 'Can't you see I'm on the phone?' Obviously not; no one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see me at all. I'm invisible.. The invisible Mom. Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more! Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this?? Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock to ask, 'What time is it?' I'm a satellite guide to answer, 'What number is the Disney Channel?' I'm a car to order, 'Right around 5:30, please.' I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes that studied history and the mind that graduated summa cum laude -but now, they had disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She's going, she's going, she's gone!? One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend from England . Janice had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in. I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together so well. It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself. I was feeling pretty pathetic, when Janice turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and said, 'I brought you this.' It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe . I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it t o me until I read her inscription: 'To Charlotte , with admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees.' In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I could pattern my work: No one can say who built the great cathedrals - we have no record of their names. These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never see finished. They made great sacrifices and expected no credit. The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything. A legendary story in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, 'Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be covered by the roof, No one will ever see it. And the workman replied, 'Because God sees.' I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, 'I see you, Charlotte. I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does. No act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, is too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will become. At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction. But it is not a disease that is erasing my life. It is the cure for the disease of my own self-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong, stubborn pride. I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on. The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our lifetime because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree. When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, 'My Mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for 3 hours and presses all the linens for the table.' That would mean I'd built a shrine or a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home. And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, to add, 'You're gonna love it there..' As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women. Great Job, MOM! Share this with all the Invisible Moms you know... I just did. The Will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you. This is beautiful and makes a ton of sense. To all the wonderful mothers out there.

July

2009-07-20T14:11:00.001-07:00

It doesn't seem like it's been 3 months since my last post...but it has.

I'm having a good day. I'm on my 5th day of 19 days off. I don't think I realized how much added stress working gives me. I love my job and my time at work is great. But that's that many less hours that I have to do what must be done at home!

But I'm not about to quit...can't afford it! I'm blessed to be a nurse and make great money with good benefits working part time!

We had a staycation day today. I asked Cole and Quinn if they wanted to go camping (in our very nice camper...not roughing it) or stay home and go to museums, parks, etc...I was shocked when they said they would rather stay home. I think they have heard me complain tooooo much about how much work camping is. We are compromising. we are doing some staycation days and then we are going camping for (12 nights...yikes...we may come home in 8). Last year I took with kids for 10 days...Beau only came up on weekends. That was exhausting...the entire time was spent keeping the twins alive, out of the lake out of the road was my entire trip! Beau is taking the week off this time, so I'm hopeful this year will be more of a vacation! We do have life jackets that fit the twins now (they were too little last year).

Cole is still such a huge help, though, at times he doesn't want to help, but he still does!

We are having a lot of trouble with Quinn. He tends to act lazy and he can be very sneaky to get out of work...this really bothers me. I'm praying for him and praying for wisdom, in how to deal with this and redirect him. Our life is busy now, it is life with twins, and while he may have preferred to continue to be the baby, he has to now step up and be a big brother.

Well that is all for now, I must start dinner. Cole inventoried the freezers for me and we are not buying many groceries...trying to cook what we have. tonight will be good, steak, that we forgot we had.

2009-04-26T15:45:00.000-07:00

Life is soooo busy with 4 children (especially 2 toddlers) and expensive too. I don't think anyone reads my blog anymore, so it's become more of a journal. Which I guess is a good thing (not that no one reads it, but that I don't think anyone does so I don't unconsciously edit my thoughts). God knows what I'm thinking anyway and in the BIG picture does what anyone else thinks really matter? I don't think so.

I'm quite certain that God would like to pick me up and shake me like a rag doll. I'm not sure that I should go into why...just in case someone else reads this. But, I'm me, and I have been accused (or complemented) on being transparent. With me you see what you get, or in this format, what you read is what you get...I'm a flawed, sinful, woman, a mother, a wife, a friend, a nurse, a singer, a cousin/sister, a step sister, a home maker, a want to be organized stay home mom, a "great" cook, a lover, a fighter and I'm lazy... I wish I was further along the path that God has for me...but I am here. And I don't seem to be able to find the energy and time to get where I need to be. Just one example of flawedness is that last night I threw my purse at beau and hit him in the groin...oops...I really was aiming for his thigh...is that an excuse...should I be swinging at my husband of 16 years...i don't think so...so God want to shake some sense into me...the last time I think I got pregnant with twins and the time before my mother was dx with cancer and died...SO GOD, YOU HAVE MY ATTENTION...I WILL TRY TO WALK MORE CLOSELY WITH YOU...PLEASE HELP ME

I want to be to be thinner, I want to be less judgemental, I want to be WAY LESS irritable, I want to be go with the flow casual, don't sweat the small stuff. I want to count for the Kingdom. I want to raise God fearing, Jesus freaks. I want my children to love God, their parents, their siblings and the world. I want at least one of them to be a missionary. I want to adopt an older child or be a foster parent (but Beau is not their), but I would probably fail the home visit. I do spank my children and I scream and you horrible language in anger...Maybe God knows i would cause my adopted childs PTS syndrome to exacerbate.

If anyone does read this...please pray for me. I'm still trying to figure out what God was thinking when he decided 2 y/o twins was just what I needed at 41...and at the same time raise those God fearing Jesus freaks (one of whom happens to be a teenager...oxymoron..maybe?) love my procrastinating irritating husband (remember I said I was irritable), be the best friend to the women God has put in my life (many of whom give much less than i do)...(not you Karen...you give more...thanks) and you Denise (sister of my heart) you give way more...of course I'm just assuming that someone might be reading!

Do you know that cooking for 6 is expensive! I'm doing good if I can make a tasty meal for under $10...$12 is average, ..$5 is a miracle or beans...and anything under $30 is way less than eating out. do you realize that $10/ night is $300/mo and that is only dinner...cereal is expensive, fruit is outrageous and I'm trying to go green and organic....isn't that funny.

well I must go change another poopy diaper...one of the many story of my days...lol

Im sad today

2009-04-04T11:48:00.000-07:00

I need to say upfront that I am blessed beyond measure! God is good all the time! I don't deserve His love or His forgiveness, but I have them anyway...so why am I sad

probably because I'm focused on me instead of him! I'm having a pity party today and hope it doesn't last long. Because I just feel like whining for a while, I'm not calling my friends or family to whine to them, I'm going to whine on my blog...so if you don't like whining (which I understand, because I don't like it either) don't read this entry.

I sick and tired of my family being ill. While I know I should be thankful that their illness are easily treated (which I am) i want them healthy and feeling good.

I sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
sick and tired of the twins speech delay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am thankful for the Early Intervention program that provides them free speech therapy, I still don't want to need it, I want Elizabeth to come in and say "momma, I'm hungry" like most 2y/o do....no she comes in "whining and sniffling" crying and I have to interpret this...and guess...so I see that its 11:30 and "say are you hungry" and she smiles shakes her head yes and points at the pantry door. So I tell her "say eat" to which she responds "eeeaa" and pick her up and walk to pantry door and say "say open" and she says "oenn" and tell her "good girl" and open the door. this was today after spending all morning at the After hours clinic with Kade (and I should be thankful to have convenient, good, affordable health care)

This gets old and Kade is the same. I'm so ready for them to talk. We are making progress, but not fast enough for me. I haven't brought them to church in months for fear they will "catch" some illness (which is a very legitimate concern, especially during flu season). I'm also afraid that they will not be able to communicate their wants/needs in the nursery and will get frustrated and act out (like bite, push, hit).

I'm tired of being hateful to Cole and Quinn. I can't seem to stop. Cole is moody and selfish these days and overly sensitive to anything I say, even with it's said nicely without malicious intent...he reacts like I said *#@$^%$ you, so we end up angry and I then say #%@$^& which makes me angry at myself and him and so I say more @#%^$%^& and Beau usually starts it so I say @#$^#$^ to him and the Quinn is lazy and irritating to Cole and its probably his fault too, so I say @#$%^#@% to him too...wouldn't want to leave him out.

so I'm sad today...I want to have a clean home (but don't have energy to clean it...though I clean up after the twins constantly, I'm outnumbered and they have way more energy, so I never catch up) I want to finish the Easter cards so I can mail the pictures of twins to family before they are outdated, I want to catch up on my scrapbooking, but there simply is no time. I wanted to participate in Servolution with my awesome church (I should spend more time praising God for HPC) I'm home with sick children, again.

I resent Beau for going to his shoot today. I know he deserves to have his hobby, but that costs me more time. I'm working 4 days a week now, just 1 less than him, i'm do 80% of the shopping, 75% of the cooking, 75% of the cleaning, 75% of the laundry, 75% of the child caring. I should be thankful to have a husband that has a good job, works, and carries 25% of the load at home, who didn't want more children, but loves our babies, who loves God and HPC, but today I'm mad at him. He procrastinates on pretty much everything and it drives me crazy and makes me angry so I say @#$^#$ which is so disrespectful to him, and not living for Jesus....would I say that if Pastor Dino was in my living room? no, but I say right in front of God, like He's not even there.

Parenting is hard! parenting 4 children is really hard! Keeping 2 toddlers alive is very hard! Keeping a teenager in line, happy, healthy, is the hardest. I need to spend more time parenting Cole, the twins will be ok. I've got alot more time with them than I have left with Cole. I need to remember that.

so now I'm going to get off the pity pot, put on some praise music, and care for my home! I will be in a good mood when Beau, Cole, and Quinn get home, and when the twins get up from their nap (Thank you God for napping twins!)

2y/o portrait session

2009-03-21T15:08:00.000-07:00

It was a wild session! Thank goodness my stepmother met me to help corral the twins...they were running around like monkeys! I was very pleased with Portrait Innovations and will definately use them again. We took these on their birthday 3-20-09, then visited my office, then met Daddy and NeeNee (Denise) for lunch. I took them to the park today and we will celebrate their birthday tomorrow with a party with friends and family. We have a big blowup jump/slide reserved, Beau is cooking a big jambalaya, Nonna is making a pineapple cake, I'm picking up a Mickey Mouse cupcake cake and blue bell ice cream...I hope they enjoy their party, I know we will! I feel so blessed to have survived the first 2 years and have 2 wonderful, fun, loving kids!

the twins have it the terrible two's.

2009-03-14T14:31:00.000-07:00

Well it has gotten hard again. It was so hard in the beginning and then around 6m it got easier. We've hit a few rough spots along the way, but I felt I could handle it. I mean, look at John and Kate plus 8...if they can do it looking fresh and fit (most days) and still apear very much in love, then surely we can do "twins" with 2 older helper, right...

We've been so blessed with healthy kids! But these "little" virus's, colds, ear infections, strep throat...while I'm thankful that they are not life threatening and are over in less than a week...it gets very exhausting to have someone in the home sick...for what seems like forever. Let me clarify, someone has been sick every week since Christmas (we may have missed one, but I don't think so). Even cole and quinn, who haven't been to the MD except for checkups in years have both been to the MD twice since Christmas. We have had 2 stomach viruses go through the family (and while I'm thankful that I didn't have 2 toddlers vomitting and shooting out diarrhea at the same time...it is much harder on your sleep to deal with them back to back. We have had strep throat, pink eye, ear infections, fever, fatigue, vomitting, diarrhea, ear infection again, vomitting again. and the times we were well, our sitters twins had the flu and RSV, which meant calling in sick to work again or beggin sitters. We did have much needed help from my step mom and the young sitter that comes to our house (K and E cry when they see her...) Before Christmas I had maybe called in sick to work 2x in the last 5 years...I've called in sick 3 times since Jan.1...and Beau has missed a few days as well (and he doesn't have paid time off). The copays add up and I found out after I took K twice and E once that the new urgent care clinic around the corner isnt one of my preferred providers...so that mistake will cost us over $500. All of my copay went up Jan 1, my regular rx now cost an extra $20/m and taking both twins to MD the same day will run my $50 now (that seems like so much more than $40). Though I am thankful to have health insurance.

On a positive note, the twins are doing very well with speech therapy. We got a new therapist in Jan and in 6 weeks she has been seeing them they are saying 20-30 words (up from about 4 with the old therapist). We are now moving on to trying to get them to start putting 2 words together.

Kade has started biting Elizabeth. We are talking bad bites that break the skin through clothes, he generally goes for her back, shoulder, or finger...she just cries and gets so upset. Then when you fuss at K, she comforts him and signs she is sorry...she is such a sweet baby girl.

Kade has started throwing very impressive temper tantrums. I thought cole was the tantrum King as a preschooler, but Kade not only throws himself to the floor screaming, but he slaps himself in the face...

It is so nice to bring them to a sitter where they love to go, they are very happy and love the routine. But because of illness with ours and hers, I'm not sure we have actually gotten to go an entire week... I'm working more to pay for the daycare, but haven't found the extra money for a maid...

I'm trying to implement the flylady's model for getting your home out of chaos and maybe in another few months I won't need a maid. the twins make a constant mess!!! so I sweep the kitchen/dining area several times a day, doing that and keeping up with the laundry pretty much takes all my free time...but I'm hopeful that her method can work for me too, even though it means I have to get up a little earlier and can't go to bed until I have a shiny sink.

I haven't found the time to download the full memory cards from Disney, but I'm hopeful that I'll be able to post pictures soon.

It is hard to believe that my babies will be 2 this Friday...time has flown and the kids have grown. Quinn is now 10, and cole will soon be 14...parenting a teenager is even harder than 2 toddlers...i so don't envy John and Kate Goselin...i hope they are still on the air in 10 years...

Today is National Human Trafficking Awareness Day

2009-01-11T16:50:00.000-08:00

I had no idea that slavery was so prevalent today. Here are the statistics. As a mother of 4, I want to know the facts...please pray for the millions of victims enslaved today!

THE REASON
Roughly 2 to 4 million people are trafficked in and across borders each year.
Human trafficking is now a leading source of profits for organized crime, together with drugs and weapons, generating an estimated 9.5 billion dollars per year. [i]
The overwhelming majority of those trafficked are women and children.
The average victim is forced to have sex up to 20 times a day.
The CIA calculates that profits from one trafficked woman alone averages around 250,000 American dollars per year. [ii]
Traffickers acquire their victims in a number of ways:
Sometimes women are kidnapped outright in one country and taken forcibly to another.
Traffickers also entice victims to migrate voluntarily with false promises of well-paying jobs in foreign countries as au pairs, models, dancers, domestic workers, etc.
When they arrive at their destination many are placed in physically confining conditions, their travel documents and passports are taken away and both they and their families are threatened if they do not cooperate. Women and girls are forced to work as prostitutes in heavily guarded brothels and strip clubs.
An estimated 1.8 million children are exploited by the commercial human trafficking industry[iii].
Children are abducted from rural areas and trafficked into a range of exploitive practices, which include bonded labor, sexual exploitation, marriage, illicit adoptions, and begging.
Young girls, some as young as 12 years old, are forced to work in brothels, massage parlors, prostitution rings, strip clubs, or used to produce pornographic materials.
Children are recruited and trafficked to earn money by begging or selling goods.
Child beggars are sometimes maimed by their captors to generate sympathy and generosity from potential buyers.[1]
Victims are forced to live in confining and unsanitary conditions and are subject to many abuses.
Malnutrition, sleep deprivation, emotional abuse, and beatings.
Lack of healthcare and forced abortions.
Many contract STD's and hepatitis A & B.
Children are deprived of basic education and any sort of parental upbringing, and are completely dependent on their captors for food and shelter.
Europe and the Sex Trafficking Industry:
The UN reports that Western Europe contains most of the highest-ranking destination countries in the Human Trafficking citation index. These include:
Greece, Belgium, Germany, Italy and the Netherlands.[iv]
Austria, Bosnia, Czech Republic, Denmark, France, Kosovo, Poland, Switzerland, and the UK.
The former Soviet Union and Central and Eastern Europe have replaced Asia as the main source of women trafficked to Western Europe. Victims come from:
Russia, Ukraine, Belarus, Moldova.
Albania, Bulgaria, Romania, and Lithuania.
Victims typically originate from a country that was once part of the Soviet Bloc. From their home country, they are transported through a series of different countries before they are trafficked into either Italy or Greece.
As many as 20,000 women, including 1,000 girls between the ages of 13 and 15, have been sold so far into Greece's alarmingly booming sex trade industry for thousands of euros each. They are mainly from the Balkans and countries of the former Soviet Union. (www.helleniccomserve.com)
One million men - about 30% of the nation's sexually active population - call on these women regularly (about twice a month)! (www.helleniccomserve.com)
A Real Life Testimony From a Victim:
O.N. has been in Italy for 4 years. She says that she was kidnapped from her home city in Albania where her parents rented a house. At the time of the kidnapping she was returning from visiting her brother who lives there with her parents. One day, at approximately 6 pm. she was forced into a car at gunpoint. Once in the car she was tied up and gagged. She was then taken to the sea, forced into a rubber motorboat operated by two young men, who possessed a passport for her. She can remember that the photograph used for the passport was one taken of her during a birthday party for one of her friends.
After her arrival in Italy, she was taken from Milan to Rome and then from Rome to Mondragone (a seaside village) where she was placed in a small apartment with two other girls. During the first week she was not forced to work, but she was informed of the type of work she would be doing. For four years she worked the streets, day and night. She had to bring in 1 million Lira each day. She was regularly drugged and she developed serious health problems. Her protectors took all the money that she earned, although they claimed they had opened a Milan bank account for her. Eventually, she was arrested by the police for prostitution and returned to Albania by ferry. She wants to see her family, but is fearful of her father and that her trafficker might find her again.[v]

for more info you can go to www.theA21compaign.org

pictures

2009-01-09T16:53:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year

2008-12-27T14:10:00.000-08:00

I hope all of you had a wonderful Christmas! We did. I was very ill with a stomach bug, and unfortunately Cole now has it. I'm praying the rest stay well. But on the bright side, it should keep me from gaining the usual 5 or so pounds...

I will try to post pictures soon.

I just finished reading an awesome book. My friend Vicki gave it to us for Christmas and it was the best gift ever! It is powerful and I recommend it to everyone...The Shack by Wm. Paul Young. I hope it will transform my relationships and life. It is a fiction book but I believe it gives true insight into the character of God.

We are trying to catch up on the house stuff and recover from the virus. Hope all of you have a hope filled New Year!

life with 2 toddlers if VERY BUSY

2008-10-26T15:05:00.001-07:00

We made it to church today. I feel like I accomplished something! We all went to Walmart on the way home, I accomplished 2 things! God is so good, even when I am so bad. We haven't been to church for the past 3 weeks. Of course we had reasons, but I managed to find time those weekends to watch LSU football, so did I really not have time for church/God, or did I choose other things (the world) in stead? Not that I'm implying that you have to go to church to be Godly or saved or good. But I seem to be more Christ like when I am plugged in to HIM. For me that means, going to church, listening to Praise and Worship, spending time reading His Word (the bible). It's true, when life gets busy, you better make time to pray first. Lets hope I can put these "truths" into practice with more regularity.

Life has gotten a bit overwhelming with 2 toddlers. They can so mess up faster than I can clean up. It is a rare gift that they are playing by themselves in the play yard. Of coure at any second, one may hit or bite the other and it is ON! Now I hear Cole and Quinn fighting in the yard. I will ignore it, until one is bleeding. not only must I fight the minute by minute battles of raising 2 toddlers, but I must wage the war against the world for my teenager! Thank God Cole is a Godly kid on his way to becoming a Godly man, but I must not forget to pray and battle for him daily, and many times the battle is against his self!!!! His teenage it's all about me...me...me...

Parenting is exhausting. At times I feel like a total failure. Maybe that is why I am a nurse. I am so angry at a few of the mom's whose babies I see in home health. I came home Friday so full of FIGHT!!! REady to bring home 5 children I know are neglected (1 8/0 boy, 1 4 y/0 boy, 1 2y/o boy, 1 15 m/o girl, and a 5 m/o infant) they are underweight. The mother yells and makes the 8 y/o care for the 3 middle children. Her youngest infant just came home from the NICU and she refuses to feed him as the MD ordered and in a few days he has dropped over 1/2 pound. So, I guess I'm not that bad a mother. I have another mom, of 7 (5 under 4) and she is precious, tired, overwhelmed, but so trying to do her best. I pray for her and am so thankful to have the support I have from Beau, Cole, Denise, Nonna! I can so get on my pitty pot about not having 3 sisters, a mom, a Mother-in-law, etc. etc to help. But I am so blessed.

I will try to post more pictures soon. Beau and I are both working alot more. Trying to pay for car repairs, clothes for the kids, the hight cost of food, Christmas, and our big family trip to Disney. We are available much, so forgive us if we don't call more. I will cut back on my hours after the holidays. We've almost paid off the truck and that will give us a little more breathing room.

oh and Geaux Tigers. We are not fairweather fans. WE LOVE LSU!!!

Hurricaine Gustav

2008-09-08T09:21:00.000-07:00

Wow, what a week it has been! We survived the storm just fine. A few trees down, lots of debris, but no structural damage. The aftermath was not so "fine". 3 hour gas lines, no power, no running water. 4 hot cranky kids, 2 hot irritable parents....need I go on. I had no idea what a wimp I am. I am totally dependent on air conditioning. the humidity was the straw that put us over. We broke down on day 3 without power, and bought a generator. We still didn't have running water because we are on a well with a pump. But at least we were cool in the camper. Of course with gas over $4 a gallon, we could only afford to run the generator for 12 hours a day. We were blessed to have power back on day 4 at about 7 pm. The twins were so excited to be back in the house with the lights and air on. The ran around with their arms above their heads squealing and laughing, it was just too cute. There are still hundreds of thousands of people with out power in southern Louisiana. Baton Rouge is still under a mandatory curfew until 65% of the households get power. It isn't being reported in the national news, but it has been very hard for the people here. Many homes have been destroyed by fallen trees in our area. This is the worse disaster in Baton Rouge history. Our children will return to school tomorrow, but BR will be out at least another week. Please be in prayer for the people of Louisiana, especially as Ike threatens the Gulf Coast.

p.s. There have been many "heroes" here. Our National Guard (along with many nearby states National Guard) have been a huge presence handing out supplies and keeping our streets safe, many other states and federal law enforcement officers have also come to help our local law enforcement keep order (than have been fight in the gas lines and people stealing generators off of front porches). Many churches, especially ours, Healing Place, have stepped up and been the hands and feet of Jesus. Giving out food, water, ice, and even free gas. Sending out crews to help clear trees and debris. It has been a long week with many life lessons. I for one, found that I was not spiritually prepared for this storm/trial. I will be making some personal changes, so that I will hopefully be more Christ like during the next trial. I had no idea my attitude was so closely tied to a/c and running water... lesson learned, I hope!

2008-08-12T07:13:00.000-07:00

Kade has a shoe fetish (these are mine, but he tried to take every shoe on the beach)
Elizabeth's footprints (in middle walking towards the right)
Isn't she a beautiful baby.....

2008-08-12T07:07:00.000-07:00

1st Oreo, she learned to open them right away

Yes, Quinn's hair is blue (it's blond now). Look at Baby Faye hang on!
This is the norm at dinner...we have a little picnic table we feed them on, but they climb on that too.

Itsy bitsy teeny weeny pink polkadot bikini. Isnt that a cute suit! She loved the water, and kade prefered to wander the beach stealing shoes! We had a great time, but it was so non stop. Cole had swimmer's ear and his canal was almost swollen shut (poor guy). So I didn't have my usual help. Beau went home for 4 nights in the middle of the 10 night trip. I won't do that again!!!

2008-07-08T04:47:00.000-07:00

We took these March 17th, just before their birthday and Easter at Babycakes photography.

It has been a busy few months for me! I didn't even take the twins for their 12m check up (bad mommy). Partly because I was busy, but mostly because I hate watching them get shots. I know, I'm a nurse and give babies shots all the time, but it is different when they are yours! Plus there is all that controversy over immunizations, and mercury and other heavy metal toxicity and autism. So I put it off. I did finally take them at 15 months.

Kade is just over 20 pounds. He is in the 55% for height and 5% for weight. Elizabeth is just under 20 pounds. she is in the 25% for height and 10% for weight. I've really tried to make them fat. Maybe they are just destined to be thin (for their whole life). Wouldn't that be grand! Considering that most of my family has battled obesity (including myself) I think it would be wonderful.

But I truly think fat babies are the best, and my and not fat. I call Kade Skinny man. I've even made a little song up about mama's little Skinny man.... Elizabeth isn't quite as skinny, at least you can't count her ribs and spine... The pediatrician assures me they are fine! They both eat so well. They eat everything. Elizabeth even likes fresh tomatoes. The only thing I've found that they both will not eat is asparagus. Their new favorite food is fresh blueberries. They like them more than chocolate (i shudder at the thought of anything being better than chocolate). Blueberries make for very interesting poop. Beau called my in a panic. Kade's poop is black...I said what does it smell like and he's like ..."poop" I reply "smell it again" then he tells me it smells sweet and I say..."like blueberry's" he says yes and gross. I must say, nobody else likes them as much as we used to after smelly blueberry poop... But they are so good tasting and for you, that we let them eat them everyday. They will only be in season a little while longer.

We will going camping for 10 days at the end of this week. I'm not sure how that will work. They won't have beds to be put down for naps and sleep. I don't think they will just lay quietly and go to sleep, when they will be able to crawl out and find us... we will see.

We are having so much fun with these two blessings!!! Cole and Quinn may not survive the summer (sibling rivalry is a curse of Satan dating back to Cain and Able, why am I surprised that Cole and Quinn are experiencing it as well...).

Baby Faye pushing Kade

2008-04-07T10:10:00.000-07:00

Look at that. It's hard to believe that she likes to hit him too...

Happy Birthday!!!

2008-04-07T09:46:00.001-07:00

The twins turned 1 on March 20th. We celebrated their birthday at their Nee Nee's new house. Beau cooked a Jambalaya and we had an Easter Egg Hunt. Then they really enjoyed the chocolate cakes their Nonna made!!! They were covered in cake and icing. It was so much fun.

It's hard to believe that a year has passed by. I was looking back at their newborn pics, i can't believe my little bitty babies have grown so much. Kade is taking more and more steps and will be giving up crawling very soon. Elizabeth has taken a step or two. She can climb so very fast. We've taken out their play table because they kept climbing on top of it. We have put a gate at the bottom of the stairs.

We ran into a man with 5 year old twins and another lady with 6 year old twins...both said "it doesn't get any better" i think that odd and also hope it's true. Because we are so blessed and are having so much fun! They are such good babies. Beau and I have both said if we were younger we'd think about having another. Beau even said that if we'd had them first, we might have 6. Of course, i think part of the reason they are so good, is that we are better parents this go round. I know the "terrible two's" won't be easy. But I love that age, they can tell you their wants and were they hurt.

I have even found time the past week to start spring cleaning. I'm doing one room at a time...ceiling to floor, clockwise, even moving the furniture. (if you know me at all, you'll be very impressed).

Life is so good!

11 months

2008-03-17T13:02:00.000-07:00

Elizabeth at the park during Quinn's 9th birthday party...she loved the swing!
Kade new favorite toys...a pot and spoon.

We have recovered from an awful week with the stomach flu. Everyone had it. I had the mildest case and Beau had the most severe! Elizabeth seemed to take the longest to get over it and Kade was the fastest!

Elizabeth's face is all better, she still has a red mark on her leg, but it's almost gone too.

BIG NEWS...KADE is taking 3-6 steps at a time now. He gets so excited and does this nervous thing where he rubs his fingers together as he stands and "prepares to walk" he grins and claps now, because every time he walks we all cheer.

Elizabeth has not yet attempted to take a step. She can climb stairs very fast!!! One of the boys forgot to close the gate we have at the bottom of the stairs, and I found her at the top. This is very dangerous at our home because the rails are too far apart and the babies can fit through...i prayed as i ran up to "save her". She was very proud to have gotten to the top...

March 20.... they will be 1 year old. My goodness how time has flown!

The Big Crash!

2008-03-04T06:42:00.000-08:00

Baby Faye got a little banged up yesterday. SAD.

peek a boo and kisses

2008-02-19T13:37:00.000-08:00

Where's Quinn??? and who put Kade in a girly bib??
I think Kade found him!
Brotherly love...I just wish I saw more between Cole and Quinn...
Now isn't that sweet. How can I not smile!!!

Elizabeth looks alot like my baby pics in this one
Give me a kiss... I'm so pretty in my pink dress!
Uh Oh, look whose learned to climb the steps...Kade will watch her from the bottom and if she goes up more than one will slap the bottom step as if to say "come back here, it's too dangerous, don'e leave me..." he will put one leg up and then put it down. He is the cautious one.

We're having so much fun...

2008-02-19T13:12:00.001-08:00

We went camping in January at Perci Quinn and it SNOWED... the biggest flakes I have ever seen
Beau only let me take the twins out for a short stroll, he thought it was too cold (and he's from Montana)
the twins like to be out and about!
this is the absolute best about twins, one on each side to keep you warm!!!
Elizabeth's new trick. She does this when she doesn't want to take a nap...she know's we have to come and fix her legs... but how do you resist that smile!!!

We seem to be over the illnesses and Kade's 2 top teeth have come through. We're all sleeping well again!

The twins spent thier first night away from us this past Friday night. They went to stay with Aunt Kathy, Uncle Dewayne, Ashlee Rae, and Austin Reed. Elizabeth didn't miss us a bit, however, Kade (who doesn't like change) did not do so well. He cried alot Friday evening, decided not to like Aunt Kathy. Maw Maw Faye had to come over to rock him to sleep. He does like Unca De (whose lap he sat on and watched tv, just chillin'). We missed them like crazy, but enjoyed a night out alone and got a lot of painting done around the house Saturday.

life's been hard lately

2008-01-24T14:48:00.000-08:00

I hate to complain, but I'm in one of those funks. You know the ones you get in when you don't get enough sleep for about 3 weeks, and no matter how hard or constantly you clean, it's still a mess! Well that's where I'm at today. I'm grumpy and tired. We've been fighting illness for over 3 weeks. We had about 5 days last week, when everyone seemed well. Then, Kade (while we were camping in 25 degree weather) was up all night Friday, Sat, Sun, Mon and Tues nights. I took him to the doctor on Monday, but he only had a "little fluid in his left ear" His nose started running copiously on Tues and Elizabeth's started as well. Kade finally slept all night without a peep last night, but Elizabeth DID NOT.... so it goes with twins. And now I have their cold....arggghhh

We are so blessed, but right at this very moment, I do not feel blessed. I know in my head I should, but I just don't. Beau must be exhausted (he gets up more at night than I ...he can actually rock in his sleep, believe it or not). Two exhausted and irritable parents don't make very nice partners. We're both a bit snippy (he'll never admit that). But I realize I'm snippy, but can't seem to stop.

I just want healthy kids, happy kids, a clean house, and enough money left over at the end of the month for a message and dinner out. It doesn't seem like too much to ask, but it must be. I need to learn to be thankful for 2 healthy kids, 2 happy babies (who play with each other for hours and nap well 2x daily), a home to live in, and enough money to pay the bills.

Right now i just want a nap! and the laundry done! Choir practice tonight (that I'm having to talk myself into, which I shouldn't), work tomorrow, girls night out tomorrow night at Mike Anderson's (that I'm having to talk myself into and I shouldn't), work Saturday, and by birthday dinner Sat. night (and yes I'm having to talk myself into that as well...hopefully will have 8 hours of sleep sometime soon and will glad to go go go). I'm so overwhelmed with life with twins today. But God how I love these babies and wouldn't trade them for 10 hours of sleep, a full time sleep and massages every day!

Ok, I added this picture, because no matter how bad I feel today, it is nothing compared to how miserable I was. It made me laugh and decide my life isn't that hard. I thought whoever reads this might laugh with me!!!

Christmas pics

2008-01-07T09:14:00.000-08:00

Quinn received a guitar for Christmas. He'll start lessons this week

Austin Reed in is Tiger Uniform with Elizabeth on Kades hungry hippo

We now bathe the twins together in the tub, they love tub time!!!
Cole spiked Elizabeth's mohawk.
Isn't this just the sweetest thing you ever saw!!!
Biceps by baby. We will rent them out for your work out...

Kade on Elizabeth's rocking horse.

We had a great holiday. We are very tired!!! Kade is still having trouble with teething. Elizabeth has an ingrown toenail (yes, can you believe, i didin't know babies got them either) and is on antibiotics. Both babies have a cold with runny/stuffy noses. And they shard thier cold with mommy...

Cole received loads of $ for Christmas. He has more than enough for the Wii he wants, but has been unable to find one. If you see one, please let us know.

Happy New Year and God Bless you and yours!

Twins are busy, 1st Thanksgiving...

2007-12-02T19:57:00.000-08:00

Isn't Quinn handsome!!!
Ashlee Rae, Kade, Aunt Kathy, Elizabeth, and Austin Reed. Austin believes that Elizabeth will come to live with them when she turns one.
Great Aunt Faye (maw Faye) with Elizabeth (baby Faye), do you think her bow is big enough?
We went to the Renaissance Festival the Friday after Thanksgiving. Kade wanted a sword too.

It has been awhile since I have been able to find the time to blog. a few weeks ago I hurt my back...what a mess! I don't have time to keep up with the house and laundry as it is, but I was flat on my back for almost 5 days...I didn't pick up a baby for over a week. I'm still very careful. My Chiropractor and I think it is just the repetitive lifting...it's not like I can quit, and there isn't a right way to lift a baby in a car seat/carrier. Thank God for Cole, I honestly don't know what we would do without him. He does most of my heavy lifting now. Beau bought a chin up bar, so Cole has started working out. He does chin ups, dips and I'm not sure what else, but he is getting some big biceps. I know this because he shows me almost daily, and yes I can really see a difference. My baby is growing up, and will be 13 soon.

Having twins has been a tremendous blessing and we cannot imagine life without them. There have been many trials. One of which is the loss of friends. Not that any of our friends have "dumped" us, it's just that the friends you have when you have older or no children are not interested in hanging out with you when you have a baby (especially two). Those who have older children of their own, seem to have forgotten what it was like to have a new baby and certainly can't relate to what 2 are like. They actually have the nerve to comment on your lack of productivity. So as you can imagine, you don't really want to hand out with them anyway... we are trying to maintain contact with a few in hopes that they will one day want to spend time with the Meisners again. Perhaps we will make new friends who have babies. We are so much older than most people with babies and such a contradiction! We might meet other parents who homeschool, but we aren't really like most homeschoolers. Afterall, Quinn does go to school, the horror...

Thanksgiving was great. The twins are now trying soft table foods and it was fun letting them taste everything. It just doesn't feel like Christmas. It is so hot here and we haven't found time to decorate inside. Beau did get most of the lights up outside. We are on such a tight budget that I'm making most of the gifts we are giving this year. Like I have time.... Actually I am getting it done and I do enjoy "crafting". I do a little every day that I don't go to work. A friend also ordered some personalized note cards from me (7 sets) and I'm over halfway done. (feeling rather proud and productive...as long as I ignore the dust bunnies, weeds, laundry, etc).

7 months old

2007-10-31T04:34:00.000-07:00

Kade's smile is so big, it always lights up my world!!!
He is sitting up so well now and can go from his tummy to sitting all by himself.
Out pretty girl, she just needs a little more hair!!!
it was hard to get a picture of Elizabeth sitting up, she kept crawling off.

Naked bowl pictures, we have them of Cole and Quinn, so had to get them of the twins. I don't know why this pic is so much smaller than the others.
I think she looks like the Gerber baby in this one
It was almost impossible to get a picture of them together, Kade kept sitting up and Elizabeth crawled away...
We were trying to get them both to look at eachother...

These are the cutest hinies in the world!!!

It's hard to believe they are 7 months old. Elizabeth: wt.15# 14 oz (25%), L 24 3/4" (10%), HC 17 1/8" (40%). She remains short and round so has been nicked named..."Tater Tot". Kade: 16# 12 oz (25%), L 28" (90%), HC 17 1/4" (40%). He is by far my longest baby, if he keeps this up he'll be 6 ft. tall. We're hoping Elizabeth will be at least 5' 3...They are such good babies!!! If they get their naps! Kade just started crawling, Elizabeth's has been crawling for about 3 weeks. Kade has been able go to a sitting position without help for about a month and Elizabeth has done that once in the last week. I think she probably could have sooner, but would rather crawl and get into something.

You can view all of their proofs at www.babycakesphoto.com click my proofs and type in

jodi_meisner@yahoo.com, password is meisner.

6 months old

2007-10-01T16:59:00.000-07:00

Cole put his Beret on Kade, isn't he just the cutest!!!
Elizabeth has started to crawl forward, (we use the word crawl very loosely, she launches herself forward and then gets back on her hands and knees) she's slow; we're in big trouble when she starts moving fast. Kade is crawfishing back, but hasn't moved forward...yet.
Believe it or not, Kade looks alot like Cole's baby pictures

Look who can sit up... we have to help her up, and we put the boppy there because she falls over after a few minutes. Kade can last for about a minute.
Quinn is so impressed with Elizabeth's new skill.
Saturday morning...isn't this picture!

Sorry it's been so long since I posted pictures. Hopefully they were worth the wait! Elizabeth weighed 14# 15 oz on her 6m birthday and Kade was 15#10oz. He is still 2 inches longer than her as well.

Breastfeeding and sleep

2007-09-11T10:03:00.000-07:00

Welcome Motherwear Breastfeeding carnival.

Please, before you read this, know that mothering is an extremely personal experience. How you choose to feed your baby is your choice. I don't want anyone to feel that I am being critical of mothers who choose not to breastfeed, or who quit breastfeeding.

For me, breastfeeding was something I wanted to do. As a pediatric nurse, I knew it was best and that breastfed children were sick less. I breastfed my first son, Cole. It was not extremely hard for me. We bonded well in the hospital and Cole had an extremely strong suck (could have sucked a nipple out of a basketball), which was important because I have inverted nipples (20% of women do). We went through some difficult issues with a yeast infection, secondary to my taking antibiotics for a bladder infection, secondary to a catheter in the hospital, secondary to a traumatic vaginal birth (he was 9 # 3.2 oz). I had to return to work when Cole was only 8 weeks old. (Beau was in school full time). I missed Cole and putting him in the bed with us seemed the best option, I was the All Night Diner, Cole nursed/snacked 4-5 times a night. I worked ICU then and pumping was always difficult to fit in, I finally gave up pumping at work when Cole was about 4 1/2 months. It was difficult to find a formula that he liked, but we eventually did. I breastfed Cole for 9 months. I had to be on steroids for facial paralysis for a week so I pumped and discarded. When I tried to breastfeed Cole after that he patted my breast and looked at me like "that's nice, what do you want me to do with it" I was so sad, but didn't force the issue. He developed his first ear infection 2 weeks later. He has been a very healthy child, he has had about 4 ear infections, and has mild allergies.

I didn't have much support for breastfeeding. My mom didn't breastfeed and neither did my aunt. Fortunately, I had educated Beau so much on the pros of breastfeeding, that he was a huge advocate and support. I was very shy about breastfeeding Cole in public. I got over it with Quinn and would breastfeed anywhere. I'm always discreet and cover up. Most people don't even realize I'm nursing, especially when wearing a nursing top!

I remember always having sinus and ear infections, as a child. I suffered from severe allergies and in all of my childhood pictures my mouth is open, because I couldn't breath through my nose. I firmly believe that breastfeeding has kept this from happening to Cole and Quinn.

I worked only 2-4 days a month when Quinn was born. Breastfeeding was fairly easy with him, after the first 2 weeks. I had horrible sore nipples from about day 5 through day 12. I wanted to quit, but thankfully, Beau wouldn't let me. Quinn weaned himself at 11 1/5 months. He preferred food! Quinn has only been on antibiotics twice in his 8 years and doesn't suffer from allergies.

Breastfeeding twins turned out to be much more challenging than I expected. I carried then to 37 weeks and delivered them by C-section. They were so small compared to Cole and Quinn and Elizabeth's mouth was so tiny. I had to be adamant in the hospital that they not be given a bottle. Even though I had a birth plan with me that said under NO circumstances should they be given a bottle. While still in the OR, they tried to give Elizabeth formula by bottle. Luckily I was aware enough to shout NO. They did give her an ounce of formula by a oral gastric tube for a low blood sugar. Even that made breastfeeding difficult. It was hard to get her and Kade on the same schedule. Breastfeeding every 2-3 hours times 2 babies, and it takes them 30-40 minutes...My colostrum ran out after about 30 hours. Thank goodness I had asked the lactation consultant about the SNS system and she had left one with me. (this is a bottle that you put formula in and it hangs around your neck and a tube is taped to your nipple, so the baby gets formula while breastfeeding). After having nursed continuously for about 2 hours (back and forth between the two) and they still weren't satisfied, we tried it and Kade. He nursed for 15 minutes, received 15 ml of formula and slept for 4 hours. We tried with Elizabeth immediately after and had the same results. I am so thankful for the SNS system, without it, I would have had to give them a bottle. I tried several times over the next few weeks to build up my milk supply enough to breastfeed exclusively. I would use the SNS system for every other feed, but the twins were not gaining weight well. Elizabeth had not returned to her birth weight at 3 weeks and this was a huge concern. They also both had jaundice and were on home phototherapy for a few days.

You must understand how difficult this time was. Some nights I got only 45 minutes of sleep, total. Elizabeth screamed a high pitch cat cry every night, we could not lay her down at all, she slept in a bouncy seat until a friend gave me a wedge and a Tucker sling. At two weeks, she was put on Zantac for acid reflux and was a new baby!!!

Before I had the twins I planned to breastfeed for 6-12 months. After 2 weeks of sleep deprivation, I was shooting for 6 weeks. I started giving them bottles at 3 weeks (the earliest that lactation recommended to prevent nipple confusion), from then on I alternated between bottle and breast. It was easier, but I was still only getting 4 hours of broken sleep. I had changed my goal of 6 weeks to until I returned to work (13 weeks). A women at the MD's office (a mother of twins, or I never would have paid attention) had recommended a book, at there 3 week check up. I read that book when the twins were 6 weeks old. (You can go back and read my old blogs, most of which focused on sleep). The basics of the method I used: feed the babies every 2 1/2-3 hours during the day, (at night, they will gradually spread out) and instead of the schedule of eat-sleep-wake; you must adjust them to sleep-eat-wake during the day, (at night you stimulate them as little as possible and only change the diaper if poopy). This was very difficult to implement at first. Trying to keep them awake after a feeding was so hard, and my family thought I was crazy (waking a sleeping baby for "wake time" and putting down baby when they were awake for "sleep time". I believe that if I had started the sleep-eat-wake schedule from the beginning it would have been much easier. I had to let them cry at times, while they adjusted to the new schedule. Elizabeth was easy and only cried for a minute or 2. Kade would cry up to 20 minutes at first (I checked and comforted him at 5 minute intervals). Please note, that I was certain he was not hungry and had a clean diaper. It was hard at first, but I was at the end of my rope. I DO NOT SUGGEST THAT INFANTS UNDER 6 WEEKS OF AGE, DON'T NEED NIGHTTIME FEEDINGS. Most infants will sleep through the night by 12 weeks of age, just by feeding them at least every 3 hours during the day and keeping them awake for a short period after they eat (you don't have to let them "cry it out" to implement this method). They were sleeping through the night (7 + hours) at 11 weeks, and from 10p-6a by the time I returned to work, at 13 weeks. The best thing about the book was, it gave me permission to let my babies cry when necessary and the assurance that it wouldn't hurt them. I have twins, and sometimes they both need me at the same time, so even before implementing this method, I could not immediately meet their needs, all of the time.

This is not for everyone, and some feel it is controversial. I never thought I would try this type of method, but when I was ready to give up breastfeeding for sleep, I decided to give it a try. This schedule is to be flexible. I have fed Kade and Elizabeth in the middle of the night, this past week. They are both teething and I believe in a growth spurt. You should always feed your baby, if you believe they are hungry. Having them on a schedule, helps me to figure out if they are hungry, tired, etc. I believe that breastfeeding is best, but I do not believe that I need to be a human pacifier! I normally rock Kade to sleep. I also rock Elizabeth but often she is still awake when I put her in the sling, she doesn't cry, she actually sighs as if to say "ahh, my bed" and goes to sleep. They are so alert and happy. I believe that getting a good nights sleep makes for happier, healthier babies. It has also helped with Elizabeth's reflux; she is awake and playing just after eating, instead of laying down and refluxing.

We have a routine that works great for us. I breast feed them both at 6 am, Kade at 9am, E at 12n, K at 3pm. E at 6pm, and K at 9pm. These times are flexible, we often sleep until 6:30 or 7am and just adjust the times. Kade prefers the breast, he will often take Elizabeth's left overs and drink 1/2 a bottle. I'm fortunate to only work 2 days a week and can go home for lunch (some days) to breastfeed. I now plan to breastfeed until they are at least year old, hopefully longer.

I truly believe that breastfeeding is best. However, I see so many moms who plan to breastfeed, but give up after just a few weeks. Let me give you a few examples that I see in the home health setting as to why many moms quit breastfeeding their infants.

One mom I know was breastfeeding her tiny newborn for 10 minutes, then giving him 1 ounce of expressed breast milk and then pumping (this is what the doctors and lactation people had told her to do). How long to you think she'll be able to keep up with all of that? She didn't know anything about the SNS system, I explained it to her and she was thinking about it. Using it would have cut out one step for her. Many doctors also tell moms to give formula, in a bottle, if their babies are jaundice. I disagree. Whats a few days of phototherapy with all of the benefits of breast milk. And the doctors that tell them that are pediatricians (who should know that breast milk is superior). I cannot stress enough how important it is that you choose a pediatrician who not only supports breastfeeding, but encourages it!

I believe another reason many give up is because of people who believe strongly in breastfeeding and therefore push breastfeeding (there way of breastfeeding). I think breastfeeding is wonderful, even if the mom chooses to only breastfeed 6 weeks, or until she returns to work, or whenever she decides it's time to wean. Many moms (I believe) are overwhelmed by the thought of breastfeeding for a year or more. Especially that first few weeks. I encourage moms to commit to 2 weeks of breastfeeding (without bottles for any reason, no matter what). At the end of 2 weeks, then decide if its for them. The first 2 weeks are hard, but most moms who do this find that it gets easier (much easier than fixing a bottle in the middle of the night and warming it up) and then decide to keep it up for 6 weeks, 3 months, 6 months, or maybe even a year or more.

Here are some links to other breastfeeding moms and their opinions on breastfeeding and sleep. Please note that many differ very much from mine. You should do what works for you and your baby. Please don't let anyone make you feel guilty or less than! There are many "experts on babies" and they don't agree with what is the best method for sleep. It is OK to try different things and determine what works with your family and schedule.

Twins at the beach

2007-09-11T09:46:00.000-07:00

Kade didn't mind the beach and was even able to take a nap.
Elizabeth in a swim diaper, she didn't like napping on the beach.
she finally fell asleep on Daddy

Elizabeth (baby Faye) liked the water, she hung out on her tropical isle for about an hour
Kade didn't care much for the water! He like the heated pool, OK, but not much.

Maw Maw Faye loves these babies!!! Especially her namesake...baby Faye
Elizabeth couldn't scoot on the sand and got aggravated very quickly.

We had a great time in Gulf Shores, AL. Unfortunately, Cole and Quinn were doing there own thing and we didn't get a single picture of them. I promise they were there and had a great time! Denise (Nee Nee), Aunt Faye, Dwayne (Denise's brother and my cousin) and his wife: Kathy and there kids: Ashlee Rae and Austin Reed were there with us, as well and Denise's best friend and adopted aunt of the twins, Karyn. We stayed in 2 condos on the beach. It was so nice and relaxing.

that is until the ride home...what is a 4 hour drive, took 8.5 hours. Instead of stopping to feed the twins once, we had to stop twice. The twins were fussy after about 5 hours and the boys were bickering. NOT FUN!!!

Next year we plan to stay an extra night and miss the holiday traffic!

5 months

2007-08-30T20:27:00.000-07:00

Denise (Aunt Nee Nee) comes every Wednesday. She calls it Twinsday. This is what she and Kade do when she comes over. Kade doesn't sleep on anyone like he does his Nee Nee.
At their check up Elizabeth weighed 14 # 4 oz (45%), and was 23 3/4" (10%) long.
Kade weighed 14# 12. 5 oz (25%), and was 26" (55 %) long.
I found that Elizabeth had escaped out of her tucker sling during her nap...
She discovered Kade... it's the first time either has ever acknowledged the other...

Kawabunga Dude...
Angelina Jolie...
Kade's first attempt at eating rice cereal.

We are headed to Gulf Shores, AL beach in the am.

Twins first photography session

2007-08-16T05:24:00.000-07:00

Aren't they just the cutest. Cindy Horton in Denham Springs, baby cakes photography. She is great with kids!!!
" Isn't she lovely, isn't she wonderful, isn't she lovely made from love!!!!"
This is my beautiful little man.
She wouldn't be still. The roses were supposed to cover her bottom, but she wouldn't be still, she is not the modest little lady that her daddy hoped for...
you can check out all of the proofs at babycakesphoto.com , type in redbarnkennel@yahoo.com, pass word is meisner.

Elizabeth has 2 teeth now. Kade rolled from front to back without any help. He was so irritable yesterday afternoon. We don't know what was going on with him. It was awful, but he slept well, maybe it was just teething or overtired. I hope today is better.

Elizabeth has a tooth

2007-08-14T13:42:00.000-07:00

We found Elizabeth's first tooth yesterday, bottom front right. she is miserably trying to cut the bottom front left. Thank God for Tylenol and Motrin!!! Kade is drooling like crazy, but no knots yet.

E's first spoon feeding

2007-08-13T08:09:00.000-07:00

Elizabeth stares at our plates when we eat, especially anything colorful. We felt so bad that we tried to feed her some rice cereal with formula.
She wasn't sure what to think, and she still has that tongue thrust thing going on. Notice how stained her bib is, this is from the constant reflux. We now have stay at home bibs and going out bibs.
She loved the faces and sounds her Aunt Nee Nee made while trying to feed her!
She was still more interested in our food than baby food...

Elizabeth is now rolling from front to back and back to front. We think Kade may have rolled from front to back, but we aren't convinced that Quinn didn't help him. Elizabeth also held her own bottle yesterday. Unfortunately, I accidentally deleted the picture. They are both teething. Elizabeth required Motrin and Tylenol yesterday. I'm so crazy that I'm using our infant pain scale from work (FLACC), to determine if she is in mild, moderate, or severe pain and requires medication. She was in moderate, so we gave her Motrin and then about 6 hours later Tylenol. Kade and Elizabeth both get doses of Motrin before bed. Otherwise they wake up miserable 3-4 times at night.

Don't start to think that we are neglecting Kade. He doesn't stare at our food yet. He just stares at my chest...

the twins big brother...Quinn

2007-08-07T18:26:00.000-07:00

Quinn loves to take pictures, especially of the twins. This is a pic he took of himself and Elizabeth
This is a picture he took of himself with Kade. Quinn teaching Kade to play phase 10... if you could have heard the comentary...

Elizabeth rolled from front to back on Sunday (Aug. 5th) Kade was the only witness, she can't remember how she did it and Kade isn't talking...

Elizabeth still vomits all the time. She's on her 3rd outfit and 5th bib today. We're back on the Zantac, she is less fussy on it. Kade and Elizabeth are both teething. Elizabeth has a large not on her bottom left gum, Kade has a tiny lump. They both are drool masters!!!

Cole started soccor practice this evening and I went back to choir practice last week and sang this past Sunday. It's amazing how even one extra thing puts extra stress on the schedule, everything is more difficult with new babies. I caught an episode of John and Kate plus eight ( this is a show on TLC, they have 6 y/o twins and 6, 2 y/o). She is so organized it makes me look a total mess who can't get it together. I'm not watching the show anymore, it isn't good for my self esteem.

Cole's home

2007-07-26T15:14:00.000-07:00

We picked up Cole at the airport on Monday evening. It is so good to have him home. We found out Tues. am that he had lost his camera and memory cards. He put his full memory card back in the camera, on the way to the airport (in France). He wanted to look at his pics from the beginning of the trip. That is the last time he remembers having his camera. He thought it was in his fanny pack. I'm so disappointed. We are getting some pics from other students, but very few of Cole. I will post one of him in Europe soon.

Elizabeth's reflux is not improving. She has started projectile puking. Got my hair yesterday (and no, she wasn't on my shoulder, she was sitting on my lap facing me). She is also just not her happy, easy-going self. We are going back to the Zantac today. kade is so happy and full of joy, smiles and giggles. We want our baby Faye back!!!

weight update

2007-07-20T18:22:00.000-07:00

Elizabeth weighs 12# 4 oz and Kade weighs 13# 1 oz. The prevacid doesn't seem to be improving Elizabeth's reflux, yet. We will give it a week and see. She is more irritable now, so if that continues, we'll go back to the Zantac.

to clarify our putting the house up for sale. We are not moving away. We just want something with less maintenance and less money (we do have 4 kids to put through college now). We are looking at neighborhoods like Oak Hills, Hickory Ridge, Woodlawn Estates, etc. We have 7 acres here and the property values have gone way up. Our neighbors just sold in days and got a great price. We just feel the time is best for selling. though how we'll get and keep the house ready to show is beyond me!!! We hate to give up the land, but need a more functional house with more bedrooms. If you know anyone looking for acreage and a 120 year old really neat house, let us know.

missing Cole

2007-07-18T06:02:00.000-07:00

I'm am so ready for Cole to come home! I will call him tomorrow (Thur.) and probably Sat. too. I'm praying there are no flight delays. He is supposed to get in Monday around 4pm. I can't wait to see his pictures...I will post some for sure!

Beau has promised that we will have a for sale sign in our yard within 2 weeks. If any of my friends/family out there would like to offer their babysitting, packing, or cleaning services, let me know. We could sure use help! Mentioning help, I do need to give a shout out to Denise!!! She is my cousin, but more like my sister. I don't know what we would do without her. As a matter of fact, she is coming over tonight. She comes every Wednesday (she calls it twinsday) and helps me with the babies while Beau leads Royal Rangers at church. Tonight she will be keeping the twins, by herself, until I get home from work. I hope their good for her. Evenings can be rough. But mornings are so much fun!

Reflux in nasty! Elizabeth spits up/vomits so much!!! We are starting her on previcid today and stopping her Zantac. Hopefully this will help. Kade is doing well on zantac and rarely spits and if he does its just a tiny bit. Elizabeth goes trough about 2 outfits, 5 bibs, and 8 burp cloths a day. And she usually gets us once or twice.

Camping with twins...

2007-07-16T06:26:00.001-07:00

Kade and I hanging out at Percy Quin State Park
Look...2 turtles, our Tortuga is the cutest!
Quinn and Kade in the baby pool

we tried to get a picture of them both smiling...aren't they cute!
my sunbathing beauties... we are sure missing Cole!!!
One hot babe and her body guard... Elizabeth in her hot pink swimsuit
Kade and Elizabeth really enjoyed floating on the lake.
They didn't know what to do with there sunglasses, but if we took them off they kept their eyes closed, it was just too bright.

We went camping with the twins again. It was harder this time, without Cole to help! He does so much, like holding babies, loading the camper, unloading the camper, and playing with Quinn! Quinn missed him the most this weekend. They fight so much, but can't stand to be away from each other.

We've called Cole a few times. He is having so much fun.

He said "if it weren't for the twins, I would move to Ireland" He also said that he is sick of potatoes and veg. soup, apparently they have been served these often. He comes home one week from today. I can't wait to see my big man!

We've been having a rough time. We can't find the time to get anything done. We've talked about selling our house and property and buying something bigger, but if we can't tidy up the house, touch up the paint, keep the yard neat, etc... And I cannot imagine trying to pack and move with twins either...and yet this house really doesn't work for us with 4 kids. I hate indecisiveness!

Bathing beauty and a beautiful boy

2007-06-28T14:17:00.001-07:00

Of course Elizabeth wouldn't smile, she's just fascinated with the camera
she does love her bath and look at those fat rolls...and double chin
I know I'm prejudiced, but isn't Kade beautiful!!!
look who's talking....

work is getting easier

2007-06-27T06:39:00.000-07:00

It was much easier leaving for work yesterday. And it wasn't as hard being away. Kade doesn't seem to miss me as much either. Though I did get huge grins when I got home!!! I will try to post some pics tonight.

Home Sweet Home

2007-06-22T13:47:00.000-07:00

here is a picture of Cole's potaTOE
DUE TO PEOPLE COMPLAINING OF NAUSEA, THE PICTURE OF COLE HAVING HIS INGROWN TOENAIL REMOVED HAS BEEN DELETED.

It's so nice to be home and know that I don't have to work until Tues. Not that I have anything to complain about! I have an awesome job with great coworkers and a wonderful boss! I was able to leave early yesterday, so I only missed 2 feedings. Kade did much better.

Going anywhere with twins is a challenge. Quinn, I and the twins went to Walmart at 8 this am. Then we came home, put away groceries, fed the babies and were off to the podiatrists office to get Cole's ingrown toenail removed (see gross picture, yes this is really Cole's toe). Thank goodness that Beau was able to meet me at the office and go in with Cole. It took longer than expected and we had to feed babies before we left. It's a pain with 2, I hate having to rely so much on Cole and Quinn. sometimes I think people think that Cole is the daddy and I'm a cradle robber...isn't that a thought.... I met a grandmother whose daughter is expecting twins, I recommended baby wise to her. In case you haven't noticed me not whining about sleep lately...They are sleeping 8-9 hours at night. It is such a blessing! I had to wake them up at 7am this morning. WOW. Those Baby Wise people knew what they were talking about!

Cole leaves for Europe on July 4th. We will miss him so much, but are so excited for him...6 countries in 21 days. His passport finally came in...thanks to Senator David Vitter's office!

missing babies

2007-06-21T07:30:00.000-07:00

Well, I'm at work. I look at my blog often to show off their pictures, but mostly just to look at them. I'm really missing them right now. Which is inconvenient with breast feeding...My milk lets down and now I'm full and uncomfortable, just wanting to go home and breast feed... Trying not to cry, trying to think of how we can afford for me to stay home for a few more months, knowing it is not possible (unless we win the lottery, which we haven't bought a ticket for). I don't think Beau has any idea how hard it is for me...

Kade did miss me

2007-06-20T06:08:00.000-07:00

I noticed last night after Kade woke up, that he was hoarse. I asked Quinn and Cole about it, and apparently he cried a lot yesterday...I guess Beau didn't want me to be upset, or more importantly quit work... Hopefully he will adjust to my being gone quickly. It makes me sad to think of him crying himself hoarse, missing me...

Absence makes the heart grow...

2007-06-19T14:50:00.000-07:00

Well, I survived my first day back to work. Kade and Elizabeth did fine, apparently not missing me much at all. Kade was almost asleep when I got home, so I was able to snuggle and rock him.
Cole loved and cuddled the twins! He deserves the BEST BIG BROTHER AWARD!!!
Beau is looking a little serious.... not sure what to make of this expression...
Elizabeth was asleep when I got home, so I had to wait awhile before I could cuddle her. It wasn't too bad, being at work. I enjoyed seeing my friends and catching up. And they let me off early!!! Yea, because at about 2pm, I was getting pretty home sick. I was able to leave at 4pm. I don't know what I will do when I must work 12 hours, I just won't think about that now. I'm home with them tomorrow and will work again on Thursday.
Oh it's so good to be home!

More smiles and twins are hard

2007-06-14T05:26:00.000-07:00

it's a little blurry, but it is so hard to capture her smile on camera...you have to sneak up from the side
this is how I rock them both at the same time. they are very fussy in the evening, so this is the usual. It's very hard to fix dinner like this...
this is the best picture of Elizabeth's smile, but it still doesn't do her justice
this is what we usually get when we try to take a picture of Elizabeth. She just stares at the camera...

Well, it has been a difficult week. They are not napping well and I'm not getting anything done. I find it so frustrating stuck in a chair holding babies and seeing everything that needs to be done (like picking up trash on the floor, dust, cobwebs on the chandelier, dirty baseboards) things that you wouldn't normally notice, but because you can't get up and the remote is lost you just look around and notice everything. Of course, I could try to tell Cole and Quinn to do it, but I swear that is like talking to a hearing impaired person, who can't read lips. They can look at me smile, nod their head and then do the opposite of what I said. Beau isn't much better. I think it is a male thing. Maybe that tail that they are missing on the Y chromosome is what causes the selected hearing loss. Or maybe I harp so much that they have tuned me out in self defense. But the frustration builds and no one cares...

Having two babies is a blessing. I have to remind myself that. I have friends with fertility problems, who would love to be in my shoes. They probably wouldn't notice the dirt and if they did, wouldn't care. Would sit there holding these two beautiful miracles and just be grateful. Sometimes I am there, but lately I'm not. Maybe I need to focus on my blessings more!!! Everything is harder with two. I want to do so much, and wake up in the morning feeling so full of energy and I make all of these plans in my head that I'm going to accomplish today.... I do one or two and am completely exhausted. Planning a trip to the store, or a friends, or to visit their Nonna. Packing the diaper bag... twice as many diapers, extra outfits, tons of burp cloths (Elizabeth has reflux and vomits often!!!) two different formulas and make sure they are labeled!, bottled water etc. etc. etc. Oh and make sure there a extra pacifiers!

I so much want to reenter my life. I miss singing in the choir and think about going to practice. I have to return to work in 5 days. Wondering how that will work. Breast feed both in the am, and then choose just one in the evening, because I only have enough milk for one in the evening(if I don't get off early, praying I get off early every day until they are 6 months...this is a bit unrealistic) Wanting to go to church, planning on going to church...and just not getting it together, or not having the energy to get it together to go. Planning an fabulous dinner, and burning it because one or both needed immediate attention. They are twice the joy and they are twice the unexpected vomit, poop, and crying.

PS they are both sleeping 6.5 - 8 hours a night consistently! Thank you Jesus!
Elizabeth weighs 10# 6.5 ounces and Kade weighs over 11#

a friend needs your help

2007-06-12T10:26:00.000-07:00

A friend of mine (from my church, Healing Place Church) Kacy Edwards is with a new nonprofit organization. She works for "Career Compass of Louisiana". She and another teacher meet one on one with Baton Rouge area seniors to offer secondary education counseling, assist with applications, ACT/SAT applications, financial aid etc. They need our help, they are in the top 10 for BR for the Burger King Have it Your way. Burger King will donate 50,000 to the winning organization. Please click on this link to vote: http://www.campaignforyourcause.com/ you can vote daily through July 13. You can sign up for daily reminders at http://www.careercompassla.org/. You can read more about it at my pastors blog http://www.dinorizzo.com/. Thank you for supporting Kacy and this awesome organization.

Smiles

2007-06-10T09:59:00.000-07:00

We've captured several of Kade's smiles on camera (he loves his bath). We've yet to capture one of Elisabeth's, but will try again so we can post. She does smile all the time, but stares at the camera in wonder... Beau loves to hold sleeping babies and they love sleeping on their daddy (don't tell the babywise people...)

Sleep continues to improve. They both slept 8 hours Thursday night. Kade only slept 6 hours Friday night. And last night they both slept 7 hours. So it's gradually getting better. I'm hoping for consistently 7 or 8 hours within the next week.

Kade weighs over 11 pounds, but Elizabeth hasn't gained any. I'm concerned, so I'll be calling the MD tomorrow to see other treatments for her reflux. She spits up so much. We've increased her Zantac to the max and still no weight gain in a week, so we'll see. Kade is doing so well now that we have him on the right formula. He still prefers breastfeeding, but he gets a bottle 2-3 times a day, so Elizabeth can breastfeed. We're in trouble when he realizes that Elizabeth is getting "his" breast...

I'm very sad about returning to work, the closer it gets, the sadder I feel.... :(

We're almost there

2007-06-07T06:42:00.001-07:00

Tues. night, Kade and Elizabeth slept from 9:30- 0530; ate and then slept until 8 am. Beau and I did too!!! Wow, we woke up feeling like new people. Last night Kade slept from 10pm-0430 and Elizabeth from 9:30pm-7am. I feel like they'll both be sleeping 8 hours when I go back to work on 6/19. I'm so sad about leaving them, but it will be nice to get back to my coworkers and patients. I don't think Beau has a clue to how much he will miss my being home on his days off. He has only been alone with all 4 for Walmart trips... I'll definitely be blogging about that!

Kade slept 8 hours and weight update

2007-06-05T12:29:00.000-07:00

Kade slept from 9:30 until 0530. Unfortunately Elizabeth slept from 9:30 until 3:30. I just know that one day soon they will both sleep 7 plus hours.

Don't tell Quinn that Kade is napping on the pink boppy...these are pictures of them from today. aren't they cute...

Kade weighed 10#11oz and Elizabeth weighed 10# 0.5oz yesterday.

Baby Dedication, pirates, and snakes...

2007-06-04T06:54:00.000-07:00

We belong to the most awesome church!!! Healing Place Church! We dedicated our twins yesterday. They are gifts from God, gifts to love and cherish and raise to be a Godly man and woman. We will most certainly need the Holy Spirit and the support of our family and friends to do this! Their NeeNee (Aunt Denise) is such a blessing to us!!! She and Aunt Faye (Maw Faye) attended the service with us. I owe an apology to Keri, who I forgot to tell about the date and time. (I thought I had, but I've already blogged about my short term memory loss, at least I think I did...)

They were both well behaved!!! and wide awake for the dedication. I hope you enjoy the pictures. I've also included a picture of the snake Cole killed in the yard and my little pirate, Quinn, just before seeing "Pirates of the Caribbean, World's Ends."

Elizabeth slept 9 hours...

2007-06-03T07:25:00.000-07:00

Elizabeth slept from 10pm until 7am. Wow. Of course, Kade woke up at 2 and 6... One day he'll sleep too. I don't think this will be a habit for Elizabeth, just yet. We had a very busy day yesterday with visiting their Nonna in the hospital, having lunch with Aunt Andrea and then a little shopping. Elizabeth doesn't sleep on errands, she is too afraid she will miss something. Kade sleeps all the time in the car seat. I'm sure this explains the difference in their sleep last night.

We have baby dedication today, I'll post more pictures soon.

Sleep...again

2007-05-31T06:57:00.000-07:00

Well, I know I keep writing about sleep. It's seems the only important thing when you aren't getting as much as you need. Last night was good. I didn't try to get in that last feed, I let them sleep until 9pm, and then fed them. Kade woke at 0430 and Elizabeth at 0530. I actually got 8 hours of sleep last night with only one interruption. We didn't get up until 0730, I had to wake them up. So now I must get in 6 more feedings before 10 pm. My whole day is wrapped around there feeding schedule. They are happy, content babies in the am. Kade is fussy in the evening and sometimes (like yesterday) is fussy from noon to night... I hope today is a more content day for him.

progress with sleep

2007-05-30T05:19:00.000-07:00

Kade has been such a fussy baby. We started on Zantac a week and a half ago. He improved slightly, but not much. He was still fighting the bottle. I breast feed one feed and bottle the next, so each gets breast milk. (I just didn't have enough milk for 2). He might take 1-2 ounces with a bottle, while Elizabeth takes 3-4. He was either eating, sleeping, or crying. Rarely awake and content. We were using Emfamil gentlease for fussiness and gas. Yesterday evening we switched to Lactofree. He took the more than usual and faster (20 minutes instead of 40 and no fighting and crying). He even woke up enough at 10pm to take 1.5 ounces and then breastfeed for 10 minutes. Then ... he slept until 5am!!! and Elizabeth slept until 5:30am. I hope this will be the new pattern, but it's too early to tell. I feel so much better with 5 1/2 hours of straight sleep. (it should have been 6, but I woke up at 4:30 and couldn't believe both were still asleep, my breasts were too full, and I worried they weren't breathing, knowing they were fine, but still wondering, and talking myself out of going to check...I was relieved when Kade woke up... I know I'm crazy, but I have to adjust to them sleeping more too).

camping

2007-05-29T13:28:00.000-07:00

We had a great time camping. The first hour was not so much fun!!! It had been 9 months since our last camping trip. I couldn't remember how to park the camper, where everything was kept, and only had one set of sheets. It's a good thing that the boys sleep in sleeping bags (and they where in the camper). I forgot to pack the twins new (and oh so adorable) swimsuits. Beau wouldn't let me take them to the "beach"/swim area, so I guess it didn't matter. But next time... we have another trip planned for father's day weekend. I slept just as well in the camper as at home. I usually have trouble getting comfortable, but I'm so sleep deprived that it was no problem. Kade and Elizabeth stayed on their schedule and only woke once at night to eat.

The day before we left we had Elizabeth's hair cut. I'm adding a picture of that as well. Now she no longer has a Mohawk. Now she looks much prettier!!! Stephanie German (A Cut in Time) cut her hair. She was great! It was the youngest (2 months) client she ever had.

lost brain cells

2007-05-24T10:21:00.000-07:00

Someone asked me how things were going today and I said "good." When I had been home for about 5-10 minutes, Beau asked "where's Elizabeth"... I screamed "she's in the van, I forgot I took her with me". (she was fine, sound asleep). So maybe things aren't "good" I don't know if it's my age, breastfeeding, or lack of sleep; but my short term memory is failing.

We are going on our first camping trip with the twins. It may be our last and the camper may be for sale next week... I'll let you know.

Lack of sleep

2007-05-23T05:40:00.000-07:00

Well, it was not a good night. We had been trying to get in 7 feedings between 6am and 10pm. It had been so difficult and seemingly useless when we tried to wake them up to eat at 10pm that I decided to try something a little different. I went back to feeding them every 3 hours (instead of 2.5). With there last feeding around 8:45pm. Kade started crying in his sleep at 1245pm. It was a fussy cry every few minutes, but enough to keep us awake. Finally at 0145, I got him up and fed him. Elizabeth woke up shortly after at 0215. Beau gave her a bottle. Kade woke up again at 5, so I broke all of the rules and nursed him in bed. Elizabeth woke up at 0520, and Beau got up and gave her a bottle. Now all of our times for today are messed up. I scheduled the ultrasound for Elizabeth at 1030, thinking that would be a good time between feeds. But now it isn't. With 2 it takes a while to feed them so they will either need to eat during the drive there, or when we get there. Woman's Hospital has a breastfeeding room, so I'll feed Kade there and give Elizabeth a bottle sometime... Today, I will go back to 7 feedings a day. One feeding at night is fine. 2 is so hard, especially on Beau who has to work.

I was so aggravated with Kade as I got out of bed last night. How silly is that, to be frustrated with a 9 week old, because he is hungry... However, as soon as I picked him up, I was overwhelmed with motherly love, snuggle time during breastfeeding is the best! Even at 2 am!

P.S. Elizabeths hips checked out just fine.

sleep

2007-05-22T06:03:00.001-07:00

Kade slept from 1015pm until 3:45am. Progress!!! Elizbeth woke up at 2:20am, we hope for the day they both sleep 6 plus hours at the same time....

Everybody has an opinion

2007-05-21T11:30:00.000-07:00

When you have your first child, you find out how many "experts" in child rearing there are...and its not just your friends and family, but total strangers will even give you there expert advice. Many people who know what you should do, don't even have children. Isn't it funny. It has been very interesting with the twins. What works well with one child will probably not work with 2. I've learned to smile, nod my head and ignore most of what other people say, suggest, or push on me. the only people I really pay attention to are those who have multiples, they have been where I am and I hope to learn from them, maybe avoid some mistakes.

I wish that I had researched how to raise twins while pregnant. I naively thought I knew what to do. I read the book "Baby Wise" when the twins were 6 weeks old. Many of the principles were in place, but some where not. Like keeping them awake after feeding them. That is still so hard! Some of my family think I'm crazy for bathing a sleeping baby. But this book says that over 90% of infants sleep through the night by 12 weeks of age if you follow there advice. I'm hanging on to this as I try any and everything to wake my sleeping baby during "wake time" and listening to my babies cry them selves to sleep during "sleep time". They are still not sleeping through night, but we're hoping. They'll be 9 weeks old tomorrow and I return to work in 4 weeks. Please Lord, let them sleep through the night by then, amen!

A friend suggested "Baby Whisperer" as a gentler approach that is similar to "Baby Wise". This book promises to help you learn your infants cry so you will know if they are hungry, lonely, bored, in pain, etc. We're thinking about ordering this book. The more info the better, right!??! Beau is just going with the flow and praying for sleep too.

The twins had they're first shots Friday, and we've had a weekend of fussiness, sleepiness, and fever. It's even harder to implement the Baby Wise principles when you know they don't feel well, and your family is here and hold the baby... Beau was at kids camp with the church, so avoided it all.

Elizabeth will have an ultrasound of her hip on Wednesday. We're checking for hip displasia, she has more creases on one thigh than the other. This apparently can indicate a problem. I'm not worried. I believe she is fine, and if there is a problem, it's no big deal. (I worried so much during the pregnancy, and know that this changes nothing, and wastes energy and is a poor witness for the hope I have in Christ) Yea, I'm making progress in my walk, thank you Jesus!

Thank God for Cole, all twins should come with 12 y/o. He is such a huge help!!! Even now as I write, he is holding Kade. I didn't even have to ask him to, he is singing and playing with him. What a blessing he is to me and the twins!!! He has even changed a few diapers, wonders never cease.

Walk on the wild side have twins.

the beginning

2007-05-18T12:38:00.000-07:00

I wish that I had started the blog when I found out I was expecting twins. I will try to write now the short version. Overwhelmed with excitement, fear, but mostly disbelief. Beau and I even now, with Elizabeth and Kade 8 weeks old, will still look at each other and say "we have twins" or "there are two, did you notice we have 2 babies, not 1, but 2...". It is still hard to fathom. Beau was content with our 2 boys (Cole and Quinn). I always wanted a big family, at least 3, or maybe 5 children. But realized at the age of 38 that we should be done and I should find contentment with my two amazing, healthy, wonderful, and beautiful boys!!! I never would have prayed for twins, at least not since carrying and caring for 1 at a time.

The pregnancy was easy physically for the first 28 weeks. Mentally and spiritually the first few months were the most difficult. I came to believe that God gave this to me to get to spend more time with me. I have never prayed so much in my life. Terror reminded me of my dependence of God, and that I can't control anything. I learned to turn my fears over daily, and often minute by minute. My faith grew so much during this pregnancy. Not necessarily that the babies would be healthy and full term, but that no matter what, God would take care of me and mine. Such a peace would come over me and I would laugh at Satan, you didn't steal my joy today...It often was a daily battle that I faced each morning. some days it lasted only a few minutes and other a few hours. And after a few weeks the fear was only an occasional visitor, one who I would open the door to for just a few seconds and them slam it back with Psalm 34:4, I sought the Lord and He answered me, He delivered me from all my fears.
It became harder as time went on. I never dreamed it would be so difficult and uncomfortable. I will not go into details, in case any men read this. Suffice it to imagine 12 pounds of baby, 2 placentas, and 2 sacs of fluid...

The first 3 weeks at home and breastfeeding the twins was the most difficult....it was the hardest thing I've ever done. Harder physically and mentally than even when my mother was ill and dieing. I can't describe it, but I did get through it with help from my husband (Beau), my 12 y/o (Cole), and my hearts sister (Denise). Friends (Karen came from Seattle to help), family, and the church brought meals.

The twins are 8 weeks old now. We have a schedule that allows me enough time to care for my family and home. Well mostly my home, I'm learning a little dust and dirty dishes are not the most important thing (they will still be there when my babies are starting school) and that Quinn does a good enough job, and its OK if Beau does housework different than I do, or maybe not as well. I'm thankful that he helps!!!

I'm starting the blog to share the adventure. Twins are an adventure and a blessing. Sometime it's hard to remember that when you're breastfeeding one and holding another and one's diaper is leaking on you and the other just spit up down your shirt and no one is around to help...